I often wish I could be in my daughter’s mind for a little while just to see what the heck is going on in there. What does it feel like to make sense of the world with a toddler brain? Watching kids at play can provide a window into their little worlds.
A lot of things are happening during play. Kids express feelings through play that they can’t express using language or words yet. Play offers a chance to learn how the body works and to practice social interactions and decision making (hmm…to put the plastic piece of pizza in the dollhouse bathroom or the dog food bowl?). Play is a way to process small and big life events. Play encourages emotion regulation (for example, staying calm in the midst of frustration) and the integration of all that’s coming in through the five senses. That little mind is working even when that little tongue licks the wheel of the dump truck that’s been driven around the waiting room! It all seems so simple (and sometimes gross) to us, but there really is so much going on.
Play evolves quickly. All of a sudden after what felt like, and probably was, months of just moving things around, your child starts bringing his/her imagination to the toys. My daughter is putting her necklace inside her birdhouse, which she’s been doing for months. But this time the birds are saying, “Come on in, necklace!” The birds are accepting the necklace into their family. She’s making her own sense out of things that don’t make sense to her yet and it’s the most delightful thing to watch.
Giving your child space to play, or “be,” on his/her own is critical. This is a skill that will be helpful later in life; you’ve got to learn how to be by yourself, entertain yourself, trust yourself, etc. So, I hereby give you permission to sit back with your coffee (wine!?) and watch your child play. But really, watch them--no checking your email or playing candy crush.
Solo play is a key part of development, but parents can also use play as a tool. A trip to the doctor’s office or hospital is unsettling for a little one. Maybe after a checkup (and a tissue and a few deep breaths yourself), you break out a doctor kit and a doll or stuffed animal. It’s an opportunity to “play out” what they experienced and how it made them feel. Give them a space in which to process this. Maybe it will be less scary next time.
Play can also be used to prepare a child for a change or new situation. Flying for the first time? Play it out with a toy plane and some figurines. Thinking about starting the potty training thing? Have Elmo or Doc McStuffins do a poop on the potty first. Model it. Reward Elmo with some M&Ms after. Talk through the steps. Like Mr. Rogers once said, “play is a chance for kids to practice what they are learning.” I’ve seen a quote before about there being no dress rehearsal for life, but this only applies to adults. We adults have had all our dress rehearsals! For kids, play, as long as it’s not dangerous, really is a dress rehearsal for life and that’s how they use it and need it. When in doubt, play it out! And watch. Watch them play!
No comments:
Post a Comment